Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Unforgettable Things

It was the anniversary of our second month of knowing each, or so he calls it. Funny how he never intended to be romantic with me but reminds of me of such small sentimental things. That night, as we were bidding our farewell for the night, he finally showed his true feelings for me. “I’m becoming undone.”, he said, “I love you, baby.”. I not only knew it but, felt it then that he’s becoming more than what he’d wanted to be. For the first time, I’m convinced and flattered and that he would feel such a way for me. Since then, our relationship has changed for the better and it’s reaching a new dawn.

Lately, his phone hasn’t been charging too well. I fear and hate that soon, I won’t be able to interact with him as I would like, not to mention, hear his voice. But I’m dismissing my desires and feelings ‘cause I want the best for him. This small sacrifice is nothing compare to the great reward of his homecoming in 9 years. 9, that is such a magical number to me. Every time something good or optimistic happens to me, it has an association with 9. That’s what I told him too. 9 years is nothing compared to our life time together. He is the choice of a companion. When he comes home, I want to be able to provide for him, love, family, friendship, wifehood, everything that will bring him a happy attitude and a daily smile. When he’s content, I am as well. When he explodes with joy, I get the best feeling.

He’s quite clever. He came up with a way of keeping me attached to him. He wants me to get a tattoo of his name, along my shoulder blade. That’s a sexy spot for a tattoo, he believes. It’s such a shame that he doesn’t acknowledge how attached I already am with him. Getting that tattoo is no big deal with me, however. I’d agreed to get it done after our first visit. He’s getting one of my name too. As if the tattoo aren’t enough, he wants us to make things between us “official”, become one, husband and wife. Last night, he asked me why am I hesitant to do so? What am I shy about?

How does one respond to such a question over the phone? Is he serious? Is this possibility of not talking to me regularly getting to him? Is he that quick to put a ring on me?

Just let me say this. I am not afraid. I am not hesitant nor am I shy. I only want what is best for him. When we first talked, he’d already told me that he doesn’t want any distraction. And I will honor his request. For me to be his wife while he isn’t here, I don’t know how much of that he’ll be able to handle. I know that I’m a good, faithful person but that won’t constitute for anything in the future. He’s doing so great, I don’t want to be the one to cut him down. I don’t want anyone to cut him down. I love him, I know it and I feel it. I’m certain that no matter where we go, our love and respect for each is unforgettable. No one leaves a good thing, not even for the better.